Grant me a Steadfast Heart, Lord

#foodhoarder

            Due to my not so normal work schedule which is in the night shift, staying up late during weekends or being awake in the middle of the night is one of the expected things to happen.

            Usually I would find myself looking for food during the night or very early in the morning just to satisfy my hungry stomach. Every weekend I would prepare food, movie, book to read or things to do just in case I would wake up in a not so convenient time.

I bought this at a very low price, and its glow in the dark ^_^

            Yesterday after claiming my license and before I went home, I passed by the supermarket to buy some grocery for the weekend and stock some food. I bought some chips, cookies, crackers, candies and a small storage box where I can keep it safe from my little “mabait” buddies in the house ( mickey mice hehe). I placed the box inside my room so I don’t have to go down and look for it. I also have tumblers where I put my water. Girl scout you say???

            So Im all set for the weekend. Next week I’ll be refilling my box with another set of food J  

Thanksgiving Day

            This year, I decided to celebrate Thanksgiving Day in a different way. Yes I’m not in the US but since our project follows the US holiday its also a long weekend for all of us in the office. Hurray for that!!!

            I used to travel during Thanksgiving Day. Two years ago, I went to Cebu, Leyte and Samar with my tita. Last year, I went to Coron, Palawan with my high school friends. This year, I went to Touch of Glory Prayer Mountain in Antipolo, PRC at Morayta, I’ll attend a seminar tomorrow for Canada and on Sunday, I will be on church.

            Due to tight budget and other reasons, I decided not to travel or go somewhere else where I have to spend a lot of money. This year, I choose to be practical and celebrate it in a more meaningful way.

            Its been a challenging yet a rewarding year for me. Looking back since January, a lot of things happened and I must say that there are a lot of things to be grateful for. To Thank God for.

            Yesterday after work, me and Faith went to Touch of Glory Prayer Mountain just as we planned. We went there to spend time with God and be alone with Him even for a short period of time.

            We started our sweet escape/journey at around 9am and arrived there at around 12 noon. We had our short stopovers that’s why it took us a little longer to get there. It has been years since the last time I went to Touch of Glory and I didn’t expected that it was actually a long jeepney ride from Sta. Lucia East Grandmall to Paenaan. The jeepney ride was cool though, not that it was our first time but its kinda funny.

            They’ve been playing old OPM songs from the time we hop in until we hop out. Faith and I were teasing each other about the songs and making fun out of it. Passengers come and go. We went from “kapatagan” to “kabundukan.” From “mainit at maalinsangan” to “malamig na hangin.” Til finally we arrived with a little casualty… hair that is all over our face and a very sticky face--à Girl thing…you know… J

            After we logged in, bought some mineral water and walked around the place we then went inside the prayer cell to pray and spend time with God. It was a refreshing experience. Singing songs of praise, talking to God, crying my heart out and praying was such a great thing to do. We went home after 2 hours of staying there. For me its still “bitin,” I still want to pray but we have to go home already considering our travel time and Faith has to go home in Bulacan which is really far from where we are and its her birthday yesterday, so I don’t want to spoil her time with her family.

            Its so refreshing to be in the prayer mountain and enjoying my solitude with God. On our way home I told myself that I would like to do it more often. Next time I will stay there overnight.

            Thanksgiving is almost over but we shouldn’t be only grateful during this day but everyday of our lives. Everyday God has been showering us with so much blessings that sometimes we tend to ignore or do not acknowledge just because we see it in a different perspective. Gratitude is Attitude.

P.S. Pictures to follow soon ^_^

No Title for the Battle

Things changed in just a snap

What used to be normal became a bluff

Words turned into silence

Presence seemed to be absence

One mistake led to another

One lie added to the other

One chance to make it better

One more move to make me bitter

Don’t ask me why

Don’t ask me how

Don’t do things to make me wow

Just let it be

Just let me be

Let all this be just a memory

What once was beautiful to me

Was now becoming a misery

The monster that was tamed

Came back to life again

I hate that it happened

I hated even more that it didn't  end

I hate that it even became a cycle

But what I hated most is that it may never be the same again

Much pain have been inflicted

Hearts were left unguarded

Broken pieces were revealed

Wounds that never healed

How long will I suffer

Facing a battle I never even started

You brought me here with your selfish intentions

And now I have to carry the burden like I committed a crime of passion

I never wanted to be in this situation

Nor I ever wanted to be the center of your attention

All I ever wanted was a friend

But I have been misled

I am tired of the cycle

I don’t want it to linger

My words may not be gentle

But I cant stay being a pretender

Though my words may be few for now

My actions are speaking it out loud

The truth that is trying to come out

How long will you hold that

Now that things are getting worst

Truth hurts and that we know

Speak out and be bold

Do it now so we can all go

Happy Lemon-ing Peg

After having a short bob haircut, compliment came flooding everyday about it and about my new look. I was really overwhelmed by peoples reaction upon seeing me with my short hair. They’ve always seen me having a long hair so it was a surprise to everyone…and even to me…yes also to me as well. The last time I remember having a haircut this short was during my elementary days (so counting down, that would be around 2 decades ago…whew! That sounds I’m really old…hahaha ).

So I have been receiving a lot of comments, reactions and appreciation and fondness about my new hair and new look. And as they compliment, there’s always the most famous follow up question “Bakeeet?”

As much as I want to be honest with my answer (not saying that I’m lying) and explain, I would always tell them… “I’m imitating Happy Lemon” and they would all agree with me that I look like her>>> short hair with the bangs ^_^

Happy Lemon-ing Peg

The first time I looked in the mirror, I didn’t recognized myself. Funny right? That’s what you call adjustment stage. Being Happy Lemon look alike is one positive thing for me. It actually invites positive vibes in me that makes me reflect it to other people. Well, life have been so challenging lately for me with all of the sudden changes that happened and is happening. I never noticed the weight of the changes and events not until I realized that I’m already complaining and grumbling. To top it all, what really knocked me down was an emotional blow. And I told myself that’s it! I need some change, I want some change. I guess you know what happened next… taaadaaa… short hair! Happy Lemon peg hair.

Releasing the Tension

I felt good after having the hair cut.

Cutting my hair was my may of releasing the tension inside me. It’s my way of expressing my emotions in a more positive way than complaining, grumbling and being angry.

It didn’t solve any of my problems but it helped me channel my negative emotions.

Almost Forgotten Jackpot...Winning the Lottery

          After enjoying the long weekend together, my best friend has to go back somewhere, in an anonymous place for work. As I accompany her to the main road, we were having this small talk about random stuff such as our future, investments, business and a house. She said that she wants us to have a duplex house someday where the first floor will be used for business or a commercial space. (Were like two kids talking about the unknown...a family and a future ^_^ )

          When we reached the main road and while waiting for a cab to arrive, theres this Lotto outlet where we were standing. I saw that the jackpot price is 300m Php. After reading it, i asked myself, "What would someone do with that amount of money?" ---- "If I will win, what will I do with that big amount of money?" And so I teased Grace (my bff) to try and bet our luck in lottery--->> she's cool and game and she said yes.

          Days passed and I didn't checked if I won or not. I asked my cousin Dianne to check the results but she also forgot. So after 3 days, with no intentions at all, we happen to pass by the Lotto outlet. Due to my kakulitan, my cousin copied all the results that was posted. When we arrived home, she immediately went to our fridge. I placed my lotto ticket there together with the magnets so it will not be crumpled (sensitive daw kasi, pag may lukot, di pwede i-claim yung panalo). Then she shouted that I won and I got 3 numbers. I got so excited after hearing what she said. I don't believe that she is actually telling the truth and I have to see it with my own eyes. And its true I actually got the 3 number combination.

          Me and my cousin were so happy upon the reality of me winning as if I hit the jackpot. We were both laughing and I am so elated with the 100php price. It really feels like winning the jackpot. We immediately asked our helper to claim the price and buy our lunch with that money. I still can't believe up to now that i actually won. Though is just a small amount of money i'm still happy that i won. I wonder how will i react if i won the jackpot. My cousin told me that they call it "the beginners luck." They're teasing me to bet again but i said no. I did it just for fun and not for me to be addicted and obsessed to it and bet everyday to hit the jackpot. As for Grace, she didn't won anything but she told me its ok with her, again its just for fun and nothing really serious.

          Its such a weird feeling... betting and winning... I still consider it as a blessing.

      

Frustration, Reality and a Grateful Heart

          Yesterday (during #TheMondayGroup) our topic is about frustration. Yesterday, I am not frustrated. But if you will ask me now my answer would be... YES I AM SO FRUSTRATED >>> and that's all caps for emphasis.

          I just received a message from a friend in the office that all of us who reports for work in Eastwood will go back in Boni tonight. Though we were already advised last week about the change, I am still not ready to transfer or go back to our main office where the whole team is really located.

          Our home is just two tricycles away from Eastwood. It would only cost me 34php for my transportation back and forth. In short, Eastwood is really convenient for me. I can save more money, more time and energy if I report there for work.

          MATTER OF FACT: 

          Me and some of my team mates were only relocated there due to lack of stations to work on and there were few extras in Eastwood. In the end, they selected people who would volunteer to go there, and I am one of those, for very obvious reasons.

          REALITY:

          Its not permanent, its not for good, its a "For A While" "In the Mean time" workplace.

          HOW SHOULD I RESPOND?

          Though I admit that I am deeply frustrated that I have to go back in Boni, I know in my mind that I have to obey and submit to authorities. I am not happy with the relocation but my Joy is very intact that whatever circumstance that I will be in, God allowed it to happen with a purpose and a reason. Though I feel so demotivated with their decision, I have to face reality that its not about my convenience, its not about me and what I want. The moment that I signed the contract, that means I agreed with the rules and protocol of the company.

          In every situation, we have a choice. I can chose to respond negatively out of my frustrations, but I can also respond positively and be grateful that God provided a job/work for me. I am just being transferred, I am not being terminated from work, and its something to be Thankful for.

1 Thessalonians 5:18

New International Version (NIV)

¹⁸ give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.